So, as of right now, for the next 16 days, Ross will be in Africa. :(
He's off being a Marine. I miss him a lot already. It's weird how used
to being with him 24/7 I was after just a week and a half. But I totally
can tell he's not here even when I'm sleeping. I'm trying to stay busy,
but for most of these two days he's been gone, I've just slept. The
night I took him up to his unit, I had worked until 4am, so I just
didn't go to sleep. I got home around 5pm with intentions of sleeping.
Then, as I was almost asleep, he called me asking me to come back up to
his unit (an hour away) because he forgot something. I did, getting back
up there around 6:30. I gave him his stuff and hugged him a couple
hundred more times and left. Then, my debit card was like on lock or
something, so I couldn't use it to get gas to return home. At this
point, I was crying. I called Ross like 12 times before he answered. He told me to come back up to his unit and he gave
me $14 which he borrowed from someone. I was sorta relieved. I still
cried a little, but he hugged me and we said a prayer, and I went on my way. I somehow made it home without dying or falling asleep, and then I slept. For 16 hours. Guess I needed it. So yesterday, I hung out with Ariel all day, coming home at 2am and sleeping till like 1pm. See, all I tend to do without Ross is sleep. I'm cool.
But! I played some guitar, and did some art, so that's productive. I really miss him though.
His birthday is coming up on the 27th (4 days after he returns home). I painted him a pretty picture that I'm sure he'll love it. I totally want to do something else for him though that's special. Like take a mini trip somewhere, but I don't know what we can afford.
It's cute though, how many people who are so happy for me being happy with Ross, then there's a couple (or even one) that is totally unhappy for me because they must have some sort of envy? Like, sorry I picked Ross over you, he's kind of what I'm supposed to do. That's what people do: get married, have babies. And notice how get married is before have babies which is something society needs to be reminded of today. Children are supposed to be born in the bonds of matrimony. End of story. I wish more people would listen to the truths that are out there, but I can't force them. Although, I have no idea how they could hear this stuff and NOT know it's true. Getting married was the best decision I'd made (besides getting baptized) and I regret nothing.
But really, marriage is totally different from the dating lifestyle. Even from living with someone. Things are different. More serious. Ross and I have come closer to arguing this past week rather than the months we were dating. But it's not arguing like I saw my parents do growing up, so I think we're ok. It's really just noticing sleep habits, differences of opinions, decorating tastes, or whatever. Stuff that we need to 'get used to' like we've been counseled. Ross and I are planning on being mostly out of debt by November. So I'm planning on taking a trip during Christmas time to see my family (we can't afford to do it now).
I can't wait until Ross gets back. We can then pay off my part of the lease at the apartment, and I can stop worrying about angering the roommate for no reason.
I'm really glad I'm here living with my in-laws though. I can hang with them when I get too depressed of my absent hubby. Their company is nice.
16 days: I can do this.
